NewsBiscuit

The news written by you…

Posts Tagged ‘UKIP’

Election campaigns kick start five months of uninterrupted lying

best to hide under the sofa until it's all overWith fingers crossed, fidgeting and winking to the camera, Prime Minister David Cameron fired the starting pistol to the longest sustained stream of affluent effluent in electoral history. He was swiftly joined by the leaders of all the main political parties keen to shovel on extra dollops of steaming manifesto do-do’s and don’t-don’ts.

Read more >

Posted: Jan 4th, 2015
More from Politics



UK crime to be made legal

All acts previously considered criminal are to be made legal, the Government has announced today. ‘We’re positively chuffed that our economy has overtaken France’s thanks to prostitution and the ever popular illegal drugs industry,’ said Chancellor of the Exchequer George Osborne.

Read more >

Posted: Dec 27th, 2014
More from News In Brief



George Osborne to bring back Rickets‏

Benefit deductible, so everyone wins!As he rolls back public finance to the 1930s, the Chancellor has announced a return to a golden age of austerity this week.

Read more >

Posted: Dec 26th, 2014
More from Politics



Homeopathic medicines ‘have no homophobic side effects’

‘It’s clinically proven,’ said Rachel Woodruffe, chair of the UK Homeopathic Medicines Association. ‘Take too many paracetamols and even the Guardian-reading liberals among us can suddenly start ranting about “Chinky peasant poofters”.’

Read more >

Posted: Dec 17th, 2014
More from News In Brief



Trumpton constituency “winnable”, say UKIP

The marginal constituency of Trumpton East & Chigley is “absolutely on our list of winnable seats”, says UKIP, after persuading local residents that it is actually a real party, not something made up to entertain children.

Read more >

Posted: Dec 8th, 2014
More from News In Brief