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Posts Tagged ‘unemployment’

PowerPoint demonstration delights sceptical meeting

‘Difficult messages eased by beautiful use of a diagonal slow screen wipe from top-right to bottom left.’

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Posted: Mar 28th, 2014
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Government now fears ‘extraterrestrial benefit spongers’

Aliens could claim child tax credits for children living outside the orbit of Pluto‘They’ll probably be concealing illegal migrants from somewhere or other in the solar system just here to scrounge or take our British jobs’

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Posted: Mar 7th, 2014
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British labour market flooded by workers from Narnia

Fawn‘Tesco aisles now full of speciality beaver food.’

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Posted: Feb 3rd, 2014
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Fairground goldfish unemployment at all time high

Figures released today show that there has been a huge increase in unemployment amongst fairground goldfish since 1988.

Finnegan Scales, spokesperson for the Goldfish Workers Union, claims the government ‘isn’t doing enough’ to prevent the tide of inflatable plastic hammers and oversized cuddly toys coming in from abroad.

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Posted: Jan 25th, 2014
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Lord Vader announces redundancies on Death Star

Head of Human Resources Moff Tarkin confirmed that the redundancies would affect Galactic Stormtroopers, Technical and Support staff and those guys with back to front snow shovels on their heads.

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Posted: Nov 9th, 2013
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