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Posts Tagged ‘University of Life’

‘School of Hard Knocks’ to become ‘University of Life’

Minister David Willetts was pleased to announce a third for-profit institution has been granted the title of university. The School of Hard Knocks has a reputation for low fees, a broad curriculum, and high mortality rates. Their courses will ‘inspire the young’, ‘cull the weak’ and have significantly ‘lower over-heads’ than any undergraduate course in biochemistry.

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Posted: Aug 9th, 2013
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University of Life to introduce tuition fees

You're fined!The University of Life now requires applicants to borrow £500 to buy a secondhand van and go around selling cleaning products and Amstrads door-to-door.

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Posted: Nov 11th, 2010
More from UK News



University of Life makes first appearance on University Challenge

...your starter for ten quid...A team representing the University of Life acquitted itself well on its first outing on University Challenge last night. With a line-up comprising Keith MacKillop, a 54-year-old pub bore from Swindon, Penny Plant, a 44-year old basket weaver from the Isle of Skye, Kyle Jessop, a 29-year-old ‘self-made’ building contractor from Shropshire and embittered 64-year-old heating engineer Terry Ince from Dublin, the team scored a respectable 125 points, narrowly losing out to Magdalen College, Oxford.

‘We didn’t have to go on the show,’ Ince insisted, ‘but we had a bit of a point to prove, didn’t we? Spoilt kids doing useless courses on pointless bloody crap…’

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Posted: Nov 8th, 2009
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