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Posts Tagged ‘university’

Student ‘traumatised’ after library visit horror

An undergraduate who mistook his university’s library for a bar is being offered counselling to help him recover from the trauma.

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Posted: Jul 23rd, 2010
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University of Life makes first appearance on University Challenge

...your starter for ten quid...A team representing the University of Life acquitted itself well on its first outing on University Challenge last night. With a line-up comprising Keith MacKillop, a 54-year-old pub bore from Swindon, Penny Plant, a 44-year old basket weaver from the Isle of Skye, Kyle Jessop, a 29-year-old ‘self-made’ building contractor from Shropshire and embittered 64-year-old heating engineer Terry Ince from Dublin, the team scored a respectable 125 points, narrowly losing out to Magdalen College, Oxford.

‘We didn’t have to go on the show,’ Ince insisted, ‘but we had a bit of a point to prove, didn’t we? Spoilt kids doing useless courses on pointless bloody crap…’

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Posted: Nov 8th, 2009
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Harry Potter admits Lampeter University ‘a bit of a let-down’ after Hogwarts

just scraped in through the clearing systemAfter a school career that saw him battling with dementors, basilisks and death-eaters, boy wizard Harry Potter has confessed that he is struggling to get to grips with his undergraduate degree in Business IT at Lampeter. ‘It’s just all a bit of an anti-climax,’ said Potter, who found a place at the Welsh university through clearing after UCAS refused to acknowledge his Defence Against Dark Arts O.W.L.

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Posted: Oct 15th, 2009
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Ofsted report slams School of Hard Knocks

Educational standards at The School of Hard Knocks are in steep decline according to the latest Annual Performance Assessment report from Ofsted…

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Posted: Apr 16th, 2009
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Bin Laden enrols with the Open University

‘Finding some time to do ‘something for me”

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Posted: Nov 25th, 2008
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