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Posts Tagged ‘usain bolt’

Usain Bolt tests positive for a Morris Oxford

hoping they won't find out about that Riley ElfThe London Olympics were hit by another scandal last night as the world’s fastest man, Usain Bolt, was found to have significant amounts of chromium in his blood after having ingested an entire Morris Oxford, Series VI.

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Posted: Jul 1st, 2012
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An open letter to the weather

‘Dear Weather. It’s sad to see you’re not well at the moment. What’s wrong? Have we done something to upset you? It’s not like you’re ignored; most conversations mention you at some point.’

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Posted: Jun 14th, 2012
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2012 Olympics to go ‘cheap and cheerful’ as medals replaced with teasmaids

World record breakers could also be in line for a Brucie BonusThe Games will be taking inspiration from low-budget 1980s gameshows, so winners can expect to be awarded teasmaids, personal stereos and fondue sets.

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Posted: Oct 23rd, 2010
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