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Posts Tagged ‘Vatican’

Google and Vatican team up to create ‘SoulView’

‘Basically, most internet users are going to Hell,’ said Page. ‘Yes, you, Arthur Bennett of Halifax, searching repeatedly for “hot nurse bending over in short dress”. Or you, Patrick Jenn of Islington, searching for “schoolgirl with big jugs in PE kit”. You people make me sick.’

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Posted: Dec 12th, 2013
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Pope Francis asks Ex-Pope to stop ‘dropping by’ to hang out

‘It’s always lovely to see you, but, to be honest we’re all really busy here.’

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Posted: Nov 10th, 2013
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Bishop confuses ‘the crib’ for ‘da crib’

The Vatican have suspended Franz-Peter Tebartz-van Elst amid fears that he has gone ‘gangsta’ on them. Parishioners attest to hearing the Bishop of Limburg using the ‘n’ word when referring to the Pope, calling his choir boys ‘my bitches’ and ‘bustin out some phat beats’ on the church organ.

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Posted: Oct 26th, 2013
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Pagans and Druids issue apology to Stonehenge labourers

Britain’s Pagan and Neo-Druidic communities have issued a joint statement finally apologising for the ‘unspeakable suffering and inconvenience’ caused by the building of Stonehenge in the second and third centuries BC.

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Posted: Sep 14th, 2013
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Pope gets bigger oar to stick into Middle East conflict

'Who said the Catholic church was up shit creek without a paddle, eh?'Levels of papal interference in international affairs is set to rise this week, with the unveiling in the Vatican of a bigger, more-eye catching papal oar, shortly to be stuck into the global argument about the Middle East.

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Posted: Sep 6th, 2013
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