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Posts Tagged ‘Vince Cable’

Horse gives impassioned speech at Liberal party conference

Topper 'aims to be Prime Minister one day'Initiatives aimed at bringing shire horses down a peg or two and making life easier for the ‘undervalued’ Shetland pony community

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Posted: Oct 6th, 2014
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Cable only got into politics because of mid-life crisis

‘There I was, chief economist at Shell, good salary,’ said Cable, ‘but the second I hit the big 4-0 I knew it wasn’t enough. I needed some excitement in my life. Only becoming a Liberal Democrat MP could slake that thirst.’

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Posted: Jul 2nd, 2014
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Nick Clegg to play with tiny steering wheel during Prime Minister’s Questions

he can make all the noises, tooCan use the toy steering wheel to turn left and turn right in accordance with prevailing government policy.

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Posted: Jun 6th, 2014
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Last known Lib Dem dies in captivity

Zoo keepers, veterinarians and ‘sandal-wearing libertarians’ were left mourning the loss of the world’s last remaining ‘Greater-spectacled Oakeshott’. The ‘Oakeshott’ had been cared for in the House of Lords’ wildlife refuge since May 2000, but had failed to find a left-wing breeding partner among the elderly peers.

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Posted: May 29th, 2014
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Royal Mail to immortalise Vince Cable in special issue ‘hate stamps’

‘In a conciliatory move designed to delight shareholders and taxpayers alike, the Royal Mail is set to issue a limited edition set of stamps depicting a severed Cable.

The set will be sensitively priced, with the first-issue premium stamps being signed by random members of the sorting office staff, who were all allowed the full share allocation of £10,000.

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Posted: Apr 4th, 2014
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