Psychiatrists are rolling their eyes in disbelief after a Swindon couple, Paul and Sophie Rice, announced that they were seeking marriage guidance because of a crisis in their relationship. Many of them have been staggered to learn that the pair seriously expect not to be locked into a downward spiral of loathing after spending such an unnatural length of time together. [read...]
A Hounslow woman won a gold medal in Rio yesterday in some event or other, nearly urged on to victory at home by husband Rob Johnson. As the svelte 22-year-old performed her warm-up stretches, Rob began some much needed limbering up of his own. [read...]
Despite being wracked with labour pains and hobbled by a small head erupting from her vagina, an unnamed 28-year-old woman from Birmingham has been hailed as a hero for resolutely refusing to be lulled by Primark’s promise of cut-price designer wear and give birth in the shop. [read...]
‘The selfish trollop only married it so that it didn’t get repossessed. She owes £15,000 in mortgage arrears. I feel so sorry for any rooms they end up having.’ [read...]
