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Posts Tagged ‘Yewtree’

Savile ‘may have been adviser to Cameron’

Details were emerging last night that Jimmy Savile may have been even more revoltingly criminal than anyone had previously imagined. The latest allegation is that he may have ‘advised’ David Cameron. A police spokesman said: ‘This simply beggars belief and will be hard to bear for the victims, of which there will be a staggering number.’

Cabinet Office officials have admitted that Savile may have been granted unfettered access to dead or dying government policies. He was known to have an abnormal interest in ‘going over figures’, and liked to visit the Treasury where many differently-abled individuals were being cared for.

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Posted: Jun 29th, 2014
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Max Clifford’s penis given own cell for protection

Prison officials have confirmed today that Max Clifford’s penis, Justin, has been segregated for his own safety and is undergoing assessment in the prison hospital wing after earlier being spotted looking bruised, ‘withdrawn’, and being sick in the showers.

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Posted: May 5th, 2014
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Yewtree Police Swoop on Camberwick Green. Local Miller Arrested

In the latest arrest of a well known celebrity from 1970s light entertainment, Officers involved in the Operation Yewtree investigation last night confirmed the arrest of a 68 year old man described as a self-employed miller’ at an address in Camberwick Green, Trumptonshire.

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Posted: Nov 4th, 2013
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