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All future IPCC reports to say climate disaster imminent



A future report by the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change, which arrived in our time by falling through a wormhole in spacetime, has caused astonishment by saying exactly what the current one does.


"To be honest, we thought it was the current report until we saw the date," said a scientist. "In fact it's the 79th IPCC report, produced in 2146."


"But it says exactly the same - that climate disaster is just around the corner unless we act now."


Asked how total climate breakdown could always be imminent but never actually happen, the scientist mumbled something about how "we must have done just enough to stave off disaster" without steering clear of the danger entirely.


"And besides, what cause the wormhole, eh? Definitely greenhouses gases. And we'll make sure the next report says so."




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