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BBC/C4 unaware that Russell Brand was sexually active




Said an executive: 'It's shocking. Were you shocked? I was shocked. We all were. So shocked, that we completely ignored complaints about him and kept paying him huge amounts of money.'


Mr Murdoch, quickly broke the story, ten years after he first heard it. An aide remarked: 'Well, we couldn't say anything at the time because we had newspapers to sell and Mr. Brand was great copy.'


'Yes, this whole process will undermine any criminal prosecution but it will mean a bump in our circulation. Mr. Brand is definitely guilty. Unless of course he has an exclusive movie interview he wants to give us, then he's completely innocent.'

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