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Big Avocado announces plans to expand beyond brunch




Huge news from the hospitality sector today as the International Association of Avocado Producers (IAAP) announced that they are seeking to expand their dominance of the brunch market into other mealtimes.


"We have single handedly elevated brunch to the main social meal of the middle and monied classes", said Brian McAhone, spokesperson for the IAAP, to the cheers of the public, "so now it is time for the avocado to do for lunch and dinner what it did for brunch."


Mr McAhone went to announce lunch items such as toasted avocado, cheese and ham sandwiches; deep fried avocado crisps; and avocado kebabs. Dinner was also represented by exciting new entries such as avocado lasagne; steak and avocado chips; and avocado wellington. The success of bottomless brunch will be rivalled now by deeply discounted dinner and legless lunch.


The crowd seemed extremely enthusiastic and were looking forward to seeing what variation on "smashed" would avail itself to the further mealtimes but rumours on dinner were that it was "mercilessly stamped on".


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