Boris slaps more sanctions on shady characters called Boris
"The following people are some of the most dangerous and manipulative rogues in Britain," the Prime Minister told the Commons.
"Her Majesty's Government has no hesitation in confiscating their assets and turfing them out of their plush central London residences. They have charmed and oiled their way right to the top of British life and are now busy wrecking this country from the inside.
"Quite honestly, they've been playing you all for fools for years.
"The names of these tricksters are Boris Kissoff, Ivan Nastikoff and Alexander Boris de Pfeffel ... Hang on! That's me, isn't it?"