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China and South Korea agree to have North Korea ‘sectioned’

Neighbours have described South Korea as having all the self-awareness of a clown on a trike. Initially this will involve chasing Kim Jong-un with a large butterfly net, a copy of the Human Rights convention and a bumper-size jar of chloroform. Although the maximum period of detention is six months, some believe the whole of North Korea should be sealed in a time capsule until they have had the chance to mellow or until ‘the cockroaches have taken over’, whatever comes first.

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