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'No, no - thank you!' says Iraq


While Fallujah teeters on the brink of defeat, the Iraqi populace were united in their appreciation of being ‘left up sh$t creek’ by the international community. Rather than be troubled by the concept of hope, Iraqis would much prefer the exhilaration of uncertainty and the sheer buzz of indiscriminate air strikes. As for the oil, they are just relived that the US managed help them de-clutter. All those barrels were a real eye sore.

To an average person the civilian exodus from Fallujah may seem like a rout, but to the sophisticated observer it is merely an orderly seasonal migration of wailing people. As one retreating refugee commented: ‘The Iraq war may be over, but it’s a gift that keeps on giving. Yes, our middle class has fled, our homes are rubble and our infrastructure looks like a Swiss cheese. But on the upside - look at the views! Wide open spaces, families jogging hand in hand...the burning cars. Good times!’

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