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Oompa Loompas respond to old book debate with diss track

Oompa loompa doompety dest

We've got a thing to get off our chest

Oompa loompa doompety day

Though we are small, we've something to say

What do you get when you rewrite old books?

Twitter pile on and cynical looks

Causing a fuss over gender and sex

Wont change the meaning of those texts

Oompa loompa doompety dat

People go bald and are ugly and fat

If you're a writer, take this advice

Stories are best when they're not at all nice

You say that it's bad cos the story's unfair

Tweak the odd word, add a bit here and there

We have to abide by the critical folk

But you don't like it when they say you're 'woke'

Oompa loompa doompety dime

Cancelling's good when it's Amazon Prime

But implications are vast

When you try to censor the past

Stories reflect all the faults of their time

Stop us from thinking that things were are all fine

Didn't you spot when you made us all white

Loompas are less than half your height?

Oompa loompa doompety dune

Learn from the words of this cautionary tune

Cancel culture will go its way too

As the Oompa Loompas surely will do

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