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Writer's picturestewartbarclay

Queen asks Paddington to form new government



During a break in filming their Platinum Jubilee sketch, the Queen was overheard asking Paddington Bear to form a new government of national unity or ‘marmalade coalition’.


A spokesbear roared ‘We’re getting Brexit pursued by a bear done. In terms of candidates for the top jobs, we’ve got Winnie the Pooh and Bungle from Rainbow coming in. Paddington was considering Rupert the Bear too, but in common with many Ruperts, he’s a right little Tory. Our policies will include hourly flights to Lima and a rapid increase in the UK’s duffel coat production.’


Once captured, Boris Johnson will be moved to London Zoo, but if he is unable to stop flinging excrement and masturbating then he will be humanely destroyed.


image form pixabay

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