Rebekah Brooks to recreate Houdini’s routine
By popular demand, editor Brooks will be visiting local theatres to amaze the public with her death-defying illusions, borderline perjury and concealed get out of jail free card. Brooks now ranks alongside some of great escape artists of the last century – including the occupants of Colditz and Mr. O.J. Simpson.
With the aid of smoke, mirrors and the best legal team Mr Murdoch can buy, she will tap dance of the head of a needle, while deleting a hard drive, suspended from the ceiling, by the disbelief of the Crown Prosecution Service. ‘Sadly, and contrary to rumour, Mrs. Books will not be ably assisted by the lovely Andy Coulson. As Andy will now only be focusing on his own escape routine - a simple tunnelling extravaganza staged from within one of Her Majesty’s finest prisons’.