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Shock, as nation discovers Boris has terrible judgement

Trusting in Mr. Johnson is now being likened to getting a tattoo of your girlfriend’s name or letting Harry Kane take corners. As a PM he has all the prudence of Jimmy Savile in a morgue or Kanye West on Twitter.

‘Who knew?’ complained one voter. ‘Other than the water cannons, expenses or nailing both his colours and his genitals to the Brexit mast – how were we to know he couldn’t be trusted? Oh, his marriage vows. Yeah, fair point.’

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