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Sunak to ban wasps after yet another attack

After yet another child was stung by a wasp in a supermarket car park, the Government has decided enough is enough. Wasp breeders have been told in no uncertain terms that, by the end of the year, all wasps are to be neutered or euthanised.

Pet shop owner, Steve Johnson, who had three wasps in his shop window, told Newsbiscuit, 'It’s not the fault of the wasps but the irresponsible owners who are the cause of the issue. We should be educating people about the good things wasps do, like eating aphids, not emphasising the stinging and the buzzing.'

Tiny PM, Rishi Sunak, was unavailable for comment, as even the mention of buzzing had forced him to retreat into hiding under his desk.

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