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Sunak to open a book on King's cancer prognosis





Wannabe William Hill and inexplicably still the Prime Minister, Rishi Sunak was overheard taking bets on how long King Charles has to live.


Denying accusations of tastelessness, Tory intern Henry Hootington-Hurst said ‘I’ll give you 3 to 1 that Chuck 3 sees 1 more Christmas. Look, Rishi is happy to bet on whether or not illegal migrant flights to Rwanda can magically be legalised. He’s also happy to insult trans people, whilst the mother of a murdered trans girl is literally in the Commons’ viewing gallery - bad judgment is a safe bet.’


‘I can give you evens that Rishi gets his green card sorted in time to live in the US after he loses the election. And it’s 28 billion to 1 on that Keir Starmer’s the next PM.’


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