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Tory Government to introduce law to say Brexit not shit

After tabling a bill saying that Rwanda, a country that doesn't extend fundamental Human Rights to even its own population, is a safe place for the UK to send refugees, the world's most vulnerable people, the Conservative Government is to enact a "Brexit isn't shit" law.

"A lot of people who were very vocal about Brexit before it happened have been forced to go very quiet when people even mention it, obliged to mumble something about boat migrants or Coutts bank account closures," said the new Brexit Isn't Shit Minister, François Duncan-Jacobs.

"This legislation empowers these voiceless victims of facts, enabling them to point to it and emphatically say: 'there!'". The new law will hold the distinction of being the world's shortest law, it's length designed to fall within the famous Brexiteer 3-word attention span.

A consultation on the roll-out of similar 'not shit' laws found it would significantly improve all areas of Government, especially the department of environment, which plans to end pollution of Britain's waterways with a 'shit isn't shit' law.

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