It has been revealed that almost the entire population of the UK is holidaying on the M5 southbound this summer. Many families are enjoying a full two week break in queuing traffic, before briefly popping to Cornwall to enjoy some crowds and rain for twenty minutes. After this, most immediately begin their second holiday of the summer - on the M5 northbound.
Tony and Carol were originally planning to take their three children to a static caravan in Cornwall but quickly realised an M5 holiday was the best option: 'It was a no-brainer' explains Tony 'firstly, the caravan was going to cost about £20k a week due to high demand. Secondly, looking at the journey time, we were going to average around 1 mile an hour on the way down. So it only made sense to turn the journey into our holiday. It's been brilliant. We've had great fun pissing on the side of the road and the kids have learnt some new assertive hand gestures'.
Carol isn't as positive about the experience: 'I can't believe I'm spending my summer holiday queuing on the M5. I told Tony we should holiday in a queue at Heathrow instead but he wouldn't listen. The kids haven't even had an ice-cream at the services yet, Tony said the queues are too long'.