News today Environment Control Officers are to be issued with portable electron microscopes to examine high street pavements for subatomic traces of rubber and leather being shed from the shoes of pedestrians. Those whose footwear who falls foul of inspection will be charged with littering and can expect to see on the spot fines of a cool £300 for each shoe, boot or trainer. Former abattoir slaughterman and struck-off bailiff from Reading, Baz Clampett, is now one such newly appointed officer...

Operating companies have announced that next year trains will be freezing. As an industry expert former Tory government minister for transport, Chris Grayling, was asked what he thought of the news as he left the House of Lords. 'Well, I'm not surprised. It's often suggested operators' carriages are cold and draughty at the best of times, but believe me we've not seen anything yet. Because as the government has decided the industry can't increase fares in 2026, then clearly the public must...

With the many vacillations regarding recent backpedalling involving previously leaked Treasury Department policies and plans, No.10 has been forced into making a strong rebuttal Liz Truss was brought in as a SPAD with a specific brief to advise on the upcoming Budget. A Labour Party spokesperson said, 'Look, we understand these rumours, albeit Ms. Truss's methods were perhaps considerably better conceived than Rachel's, nevertheless, the Chancellor wishes to state categorically she takes full...