Post Office admits pre-Horizon system Abacus may have been faulty

While the inquiry into the Horizon IT scandal continues its work, the Post Office has now admitted that the accounting system prior to Horizon may itself have been faulty. Abacus seemed at first glance to be a relatively straightforward rod and bead apparatus, but sub-postmasters have revealed they had their doubts about its accuracy soon after it was installed.

Raj Williams, who ran a small village post office, said problems started almost immediately after he received his Abacus from Post Office Counters. 'It just didn’t add up,' he told us. 'I’d be pushing these beads about for each transaction and at the end of the day what was on the Abacus didn’t match what I had in the till. I rang the Help Desk but they completely ticked me off. Told me to pick it up and put it down again.'

Meanwhile, The Post Office concedes there might have been an issue with sum devices, but insists nobody is making a drama out of it and any compensation due will be tabulated in the usual way.

A spokesperson for Fujitsu commented, 'At least we’re not in the frame for this one.'

Photo by Kati Hoehl on Unsplash

Harris challenges Trump to an IQ test

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Prisoners’ families say their rights are being ignored in premature prison clear out of scroats

The government has been accused of lacking compassion after thousands of scroats have unexpectedly been released early from prison to make way for Nigel Farage and Tommy Robinson’s rioting mates.

'We thought we'd seen the back of him for long enough to turn our lives around" a Mrs Grout told Newsbiscuit "But the kids have only just got used to their latest dad; and he'll get told to sling his hook sharpish, when the original one comes home.'

More prisoners are expected to be released when the Post Office and Covid Inquiry reports are published to find room for the Tory Party and its corrupt mates.

Social workers however, are warning of potential problems prison workers' families may face after wardens have to spend their days in the company of these dregs of humanity, with no way to vent their anger before they return home.

A suggestion that wardens’ families could be provided with a cat for wardens to kick has been met with outrage by felinists.