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Join the noble Lord Peter in his Prince of Darkness theme park in Islington, as he takes his country and party on a steep slide into the mud. Scream with disgust as you see him ride the vomit-inducing Gravy Train, the Kickback, the Double Cross, the Turncoat and the Sleazy Rider. Exit through the grift shop. image from pixabay www.newsbiscuit.com

Petrol pumps run by BP, Shell and others are to be recalibrated to show in real time how much you are contributing to the profits of big oil every time you fill up your car, it has been confirmed. ‘Look, everyone knows we are making a sickening amount of money every time you touch that petrol pump’, said Mike Stetson, Chief Executive of lobbying firm, Oil be Back. ‘It’s about time we now celebrated this greed in all its’ obscene glory.' ‘Look, there we go, you spilt a drop as

The Comments Section is currently closed. Please wend your way to Facebook https://www.facebook.com/NewsBiscuit  to enter.   The closing date for the competition will be Friday night or when our Editor 'gets their arse into gear'. The winner will be selected in a frustratingly arbitrary and capricious way. The Judge’s verdict is final and has probably been influenced by bribery. Late entries will be late. The winning caption will be posted and preserved on Newsbiscuit, with t

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West Moorland District Council urgently needs to save money following ill-advised investments in casinos, wind farms, industrial units, a chip shop, and a rail tunnel under Buckinghamshire. Councillors had debated cutting black bin collections from every two weeks to every three weeks or even every four weeks.  But the savings did not stack up.  To balance the books, the council has voted to empty black bins once a year, on April 1st. ‘We are doing this to boost recycling,’ s

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The Conservative party has suspended the use of court warrants to force entry into yachts and mansions to fit prepayment meters. An undercover investigation by the Times appears to show a group of senior Tory MPs banging on the door of a Mayfair building before a team of locksmiths and accountants force their way inside. Vladimir Lobamolotov, a single parent oil trader with close ties to the Kremlin, was too frightened to open his door. Once entry had been gained, the account

If you only watch one police fly-on-the-wall documentary this spring, then WATCH THIS ONE. The show takes you BEHIND THE SCENES at the Met, revealing the highs and lows of police procedure, played out before your very eyes. It’s a real eye opener. Eye watering, even. The shows camera teams received, exclusive, unfettered and unfiltered access to police work behind the scenes. Finally, you get to see beyond the car chases, the sirens, the fights, the smashed in doors and th