Serial rapist “definitely no threat to women”, say experts

Kevin McTaggart, convicted today in Glasgow’s Crown Court of the rape of 17 women over a period of several years, is “definitely not a threat to women”, experts have pronounced.

They went on to say there was no problem at all with sending her to a women’s prison, in line with her recent change of gender identification.

McTaggart, who wishes now to be known as Cassandra, said that she’d made this last-minute decision “in order to be true to what I feel inside”, and definitely not because she looked forward to having hundreds of vulnerable women unable to get away from her.

The decision was welcomed by trans campaigners, who said they regret the fact that some unenlightened people still insist on scaremongering.

”For God’s sake, we just want to live our lives - we’re no threat to women whatsoever. I would have thought all the death and rape threats I sent those feminist bitches had made that clear.”

www.newsbiscuit.com

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Ministry of Justice set to free up case backlogs by new 'toss of a coin - best of three' trials

The government has announced it's looking into plans to discontinue the long established principle of trial by jury, and instead replace it with the toss of a coin - best of three; thereby speeding up and ultimately clearing the current backlog of cases caught up in the judicial system.

A spokesperson for The Ministry of Justice told reporters: 'We would use specially made tamper-proof gold coins for every court in the land, and instead of all this six-month trial nonsense for those who are clearly guilty, the judge, or if the Judge is playing golf then the clerk, will simply flip the coin. Heads the defendant is guilty and Tails they are going down.

'Making it best of three ensures the process is vaguely foolproof. Then it's "next case please", a fortune saved for the taxpayer and the court backlog cleared in double-quick time. But rest assured. The golden thread will be uppermost in our minds at all times.'

photo: https://pixabay.com/users/williamcho-1724357/

Putin forced to reassess plans for afterlife