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It has just been announced that union reps and the workers they represent will record a modern version of a Christmas classic in order to raise money for people currently suffering with the cost-of-living crisis.

If you'd like to sing along when you hear it on the radio or at your local picket line, here are your lyrics:


The Twelve Days of Staggered Walkouts


On the first day of staggered walkouts

My union rep gave to me

A vest of high visibi-li-ty


On the second day of staggered walkouts

My union rep gave to me

Two reasons to chant stuff

And a vest of high visibi-li-ty


On the third day of staggered walkouts

My union rep gave to me

Three biro pens

Two reasons to chant stuff

And a vest of high visibi-li-ty


On the fourth day of staggered walkouts

My union rep gave to me

Four quite strong words

Three biro pens

Two reasons to chant stuff

And a vest of high visibi-li-ty


On the fifth day of staggered walkouts

My union rep gave to me

Five cold pas-ties

Four quite strong words

Three biro pens

Two reasons to chant stuff

And a vest of high visibi-li-ty


On the sixth day of staggered walkouts

My union rep gave to me

Six placards waving

Five cold pas-ties

Four quite strong words

Three biro pens

Two reasons to chant stuff

And a vest of high visibi-li-ty


On the seventh day of staggered walkouts

My union rep gave to me

Seven deadly sins

Six placards waving

Five cold pas-ties

Four quite strong words

Three biro pens

Two reasons to chant stuff

And a vest of high visibi-li-ty


On the eighth day of staggered walkouts

My union rep gave to me

Eight feelings sinking

Seven deadly sins

Six placards waving

Five cold pas-ties

Four quite strong words

Three biro pens

Two reasons to chant stuff

And a vest of high visibi-li-ty


On the ninth day of staggered walkouts

My union rep gave to me

Nine heaters heating

Eight feelings sinking

Seven deadly sins

Six placards waving

Five cold pas-ties

Four quite strong words

Three biro pens

Two reasons to chant stuff

And a vest of high visibi-li-ty


On the tenth day of staggered walkouts

My union rep gave to me

Ten people tweeting

Nine heaters heating

Eight feelings sinking

Seven deadly sins

Six placards waving

Five cold pas-ties

Four quite strong words

Three biro pens

Two reasons to chant stuff

And a vest of high visibi-li-ty


On the eleventh day of staggered walkouts

My union rep gave to me

Eleven police policing

Ten people tweeting

Nine heaters heating

Eight feelings sinking

Seven deadly sins

Six placards waving

Five cold pas-ties

Four quite strong words

Three biro pens

Two reasons to chant stuff

And a vest of high visibi-li-ty


On the twelfth day of staggered walkouts

My manager gave to me

My P45




Following the breakdown of a series of Zoom meetings to discuss pay and conditions, telecommuting staff have voted to take industrial action and are preparing to go on remote strike. The action could see workers failing to attend virtual communication seminars, remote documentation reviews and on-line management briefings, all without the need to blame their internet connection or IT set-up.


The Union Convenor explained that the pay offer had been rejected by the membership via a postal ballot, although most of the votes had been cast remotely by proxy to save workers from having to leave their home office environment.


Meanwhile, the Company said that it was suspending the benefit of being able to work from home during the period of industrial action. A spokesman explained, ‘We expect striking workers to turn up and strike from their workplace.’


However, one worker is preparing for a long slog away from the laptop in his spare bedroom. He has already ordered a brazier from Amazon to stand beside when on virtual picket line duty in his garden.


image from pixabay

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