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Biden to present Sunak with award

In a slight change of itinerary, President Biden's much-anticipated trip to Northern Ireland will take a brief detour so that the UK Prime Minister can be presented with an award for the nation with the worst performing economy in the G7. The award ceremony will take place in the Belfast Airport Starbucks, but due to "security concerns" associated with the Presidents visit, Rish! Sunak has insisted that photographers must be barred from attending.

Downing Street is apparently unperturbed at the prospect of receiving this award, pointing out that it hasn't been kicked out of the G7 yet and it isn't as embarrassing as the 2021 Eurovision Song Contest when the UK received nul points under Boris Johnson's leadership.

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