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Ann Widdecombe’s house opened to the public as terrible warning from the present
The National Trust is to open Ann Widdecombe’s house to visitors, as part of a move to be ‘open and honest’ about properties with ‘links to outdated practices and beliefs we now consider abhorrent’. [read...]
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Trump selects Stormy Daniels to replace that hideous Ginsburg woman
Following the death of some “sharp-tongued old hag” who did some stuff for women and rattled on for years about gender equality, [read...]
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Patriotism is totally different than Nationalism…but only the spelling
Moderate politicians are increasingly jealous of all the attention that corrupt leaders seem to be getting; [read...]
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Northerners have R number replaced by butter-spreading analogy
As everywhere, except the lucrative Blackpool Illuminations, in the north is now incurring tighter Covid restrictions, an insider from the embattled Department of Health disclosed: “Northerners aren’t following Matt’s guidelines. He assumes it’s their inability to understand the advice rather than contrary guidelines that ministers routinely disobey to be the problem.” “We needed a rustic… [read...]
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Pasta and toilet roll salesman orders second Ferrari
A man who owns a small business specialising in selling dried pasta and toilet roll has celebrated the latest corona virus restrictions by placing an order for a brand new Ferrari. Frank Gittens, from Northampton, [read...]
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Churchill looked at not complying with legal treaty ‘in a specific manner’.
Historians have unearthed documents suggesting that in 1939 Churchill attempted to prevent Great Britain declaring war on Germany when they invaded Poland. Notes from Cabinet meetings that were returned from a private researcher who had loaned the notes for a book on Churchill include lines like ‘This is inconvenient, [read...]
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Public health comedy double act runs into early dilemma.
Double acts like Laurel and Hardy, Abbot and Costello, and Johnson and Cummings have always traded on the funny guy – straight guy chemistry that made them so funny. The new public health double act of Whitty and Vallance has run into two early problems. [read...]
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Tories furious that Sasha Swire revelations don’t capture the half of it.
Tory grandees apoplectic at discreet revelations in wife of the former Foreign Minister’s diary are complaining the embarrassing tittle-tattle doesn’t go far enough in documenting their eye-wateringly insensitive excesses. An anonymous pink-trousered ex-minister brayed; “She’s made us sound like council estate scum. [read...]