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MPs willl no longer be able to bring board games to play on the last day before the summer recess, Lindsay Hoyle, speaker of the house, has said.


Mr Hoyle said he had changed his mind because of the rowdy scenes before this week’s Prime Minister’s Questions, which led to Neale Hanvey and Kenny MacAskill from the Alba Party being expelled from the House of Commons.


“They have spoiled it for themselves and they have spoiled it for everybody else,” Mr Hoyle told dismayed MPs.


Sir Keir Starmer was heard to shout out: “Oh my god, that is well unfair!”


Some MPs are keen to display their best behaviour in order to persuade Mr Hoyle to change his mind. A number were seen sitting up straight with their fingers on their lips, and putting their hand up when they wanted to speak.


Also, Home Secretary Priti Patel has launched a Bring Back Hangman campaign, although when questioned about this she replied: “Game? What game?”


However, one civil servant has suggested that Mr Hoyle is using the rowdy behaviour as an excuse and is really wanting to avoid the scenes of chaos when the Prime Minister allowed the cabinet to bring in games last year.


“The Home Office were playing Operation, when the Health Department were playing Cluedo, and the Defence department were playing Monopoly while the Treasury were playing Battleships,” they said.


They added the problem could be blamed on a lack of leadership.


"A prime minister should be able to play political chess but this one can barely manage tiddlywinks," they said.


image from pixabay


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A radio DJ who worked for the BBC during the ‘peak paedo’ years is in a consensual relationship with an age-appropriate woman. Bob Bridlington met his now wife through mutual friends when they were both adults. They discovered they had a similar sense of humour and several shared interests. They have been married for 22 years.


‘We had to keep things quiet at first. It wasn’t the done thing at the time’ admitted Bridlington ‘I had to lie and say she was an underage groupie.’


‘Bridlington’s actions are disgusting – typical of the EU and its pro-paedophile agenda.’ shrieked Daily Express reader Marianne Morrison ‘Defund the BBC and give the money saved to the Queen to spend on Prince Andrew’s legal and sweat band bills.’


image from pixabay

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