"If her Maj hasn't replied, then she's probably at a better street party."

Winner: deskpilot

Runners-Up: "...and then Gino d'Acampo dropped his kecks, stuck two lemons up his arse and squeezed them into my frying pan..." (dickeveryman); "Don't worry, Sue Gray - it's a wok event" (jimskinz).

Climate Change Deniers Have a Picnic in the Park

Winner: Sinnick

Runners-Up: "Britain’s synchronised swimming team make bold choice to begin performance with Bridge game." (@simonjjames); "Sirens down tools as pay talks collapse" (Flash ‘Arry)

Honourable Mention: "They're not buoys, they're gurls." (Lockjaw)

Cost of Living Crisis: Brits Forced to Eat Plastic Beer Cups to Survive.

Winner: sirlupus

Runners-Up:

"Man with beer glass growing out of face too shy to talk to woman with flag growing out of head." (sydalg);

"Essex couple only 6 pints away from Brexit making sense." (apepper)