“It was all there where I left it. I even wrote a little note that said, “Here is a lot of money”. It really is terribly worrying that this inexperienced chancellor, whoever his name is, has lost it all. When I left, fully expecting to return after a massive Tory election win, I thought I would carry on with all my good work. There was a total absence of economic black holes at that point, my plan was to lower taxes and give gift vouchers to everyone. Weird.”
He then tutted and shook his head. “I mean to lose all that money in such a short period of time is terrible, I think they may have pulled a full Truss so to speak”, an aide then whispered something in his ear, and he then muttered, “She was on our side?”