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Chelsea Football Club has been granted special, unique status following a fourth consecutive cup final win avoidance.


FA Executive Ron Mann confirmed, 'Starting next season, Chelsea will be proactively encouraged to not compete in further FA Cup matches. It's for their own good.'


image from pixabay


The Football Association has taken the FA Cup back from previous holders Crystal Palace after what is being called ‘an embarrassment to the brand’. The FA have taken this unprecedented step due to the biggest FA Cup shock ever in the history of the oldest and most prestigious football cup competition in the world.


Macclesfield FC of the National League North are 117 places below Crystal Palace but soundly and deservedly beat them 2-1. Although many football fans found this very, very funny, the FA were not amused.


A spokesblazer explained, ‘We expect the FA Cup holders to be ambassadors for the competition, maintaining the highest standards of football artistry and entertainment, while heartlessly despatching lower league opponents so the prize money stays with the top teams. Crystal Palace dragging Macclesfield down to their level and then losing to them has caused irreparable damage and embarrassment to the association, so we had to act.’


It is understood that the FA Cup has been awarded to Manchester City instead. Not only were they the defeated finalists due to refereeing incompetence, but they demonstrated how FA Cup holders are expected to thrash smaller clubs, defeating Exeter City 10-1.


The spokesblazer added, ‘Awarding the FA Cup to Manchester City now will probably save a bit of admin in May too.’

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