Ministers and heads of state from all over the world, meeting in Dubai for the Conference Of the Parties to Obviate the Universal Threat (or Cop Out) 28 conference, have issued a statement upgrading the status of impending climate disaster from “meh” to “whatever”.
The statement was issued after a prolonged discussion as to whether future Cop Outs could be held somewhere a bit more fun.
'Sure Dubai is great for shopping - I knew I shouldn'a brought the wife!” quipped one senior politician from a country with a huge carbon footprint. “And you can get a drink if you know the right people.'
'But it's so damn hot and there's no nightlife. Couldn’t we do it in Bangkok or somewhere next time?'
'Yeah, then you definitely won’t bring the wife!” laughed his colleague from another oil producing nation.
”I’m not saying we’ve had no fun at all,” he continued. “I’ve never laughed so hard as yesterday, when someone suggested politicians from neighbouring countries could share private jets when flying to these conferences.
”I mean, seriously - if we start applying the same rules to ourselves as we do to the little people, where will it end? Paying taxes?!?'