Post Office admits pre-Horizon system Abacus may have been faulty

While the inquiry into the Horizon IT scandal continues its work, the Post Office has now admitted that the accounting system prior to Horizon may itself have been faulty. Abacus seemed at first glance to be a relatively straightforward rod and bead apparatus, but sub-postmasters have revealed they had their doubts about its accuracy soon after it was installed.

Raj Williams, who ran a small village post office, said problems started almost immediately after he received his Abacus from Post Office Counters. 'It just didn’t add up,' he told us. 'I’d be pushing these beads about for each transaction and at the end of the day what was on the Abacus didn’t match what I had in the till. I rang the Help Desk but they completely ticked me off. Told me to pick it up and put it down again.'

Meanwhile, The Post Office concedes there might have been an issue with sum devices, but insists nobody is making a drama out of it and any compensation due will be tabulated in the usual way.

A spokesperson for Fujitsu commented, 'At least we’re not in the frame for this one.'

Photo by Kati Hoehl on Unsplash

AlliBnB

.

Government freebie scandal continues, as donations to Larry the cat are revealed

Following on from recent news stories regarding freebies received by the PM and other government officials, insiders at no. 10 have leaked information about gifts donated to Larry the Downing Street cat - by none other than the American singer-songwriter, Taylor Swift.

We managed to speak to Larry during a break in his busy schedule of sleeping and eating, and he told us, “When Ms Swift heard the news about the PM receiving free tickets to one of her concerts, she was quite chuffed to know she had fans in the Prime Minister’s household. As she’s a self-confessed ‘cat lady’, she decided to send me a few gifts, including a new collar, a bed and a scratching post. I don’t know why anyone would be upset by that. I needed some new gear, and if Taylor hadn’t provided them they would have had to be paid for out of government coffers, so me accepting those freebies is really saving the tax payers money.

Although I must admit, I didn’t really need the scratching post. I recently came across a portrait of Margaret Thatcher which had been taken down and left leaning up a wall in a spare room, so I’ve been keeping my claws nice and sharp on that.

“As for the PM’s freebies, I don’t think you’ll be seeing those again. I’ve already covered the trousers in cat hair, and I’ve left a small donation of my own in each of his shoes.”

image from pixabay