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Writer's pictureNewsBiscuit

Care Home virus deaths recorded as alien abductions.




It transpires that the UK government has been suppressing Coronavirus mortality rates by ignoring non-hospital deaths and passing them off as the work of extra-terrestrial kidnappers.


Said one bereaved relative: ‘I got a call from the Home that mother was not dead but had simply gone to live on a farm’. The policy is called ‘Schrödinger's Care Home’, whereby residents are simultaneously deceased but also technically on a Saga cruise holiday.








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