Controversial statement made by Bran Coax, Professor of PE at the Shortt-Plancks Institute, Washington (Tyne and Wear).
"It's the same old sh*t," he declared to our Science Editor Jami Alkoloid. "Ten billion dollars, to look back (air quotes) 13 billion years and it still just looks like Firework Night.
"Dark matter, pah! My left nut. Let me tell you my own ground-breaking, or should that be firmament-breaking theory? It is called the Insects on the Windshield Theory. Basically, we are hurtling through space and .... Hey! Where are you going? The World needs to know this. Stop! My research grant runs out next month".
image from pixabay