As his first act as President, Mr. Trump has signed an executive order to unleash Lovecraftian terror upon an unsuspecting public. Naturally this has caused some backlash with #NotMyCosmicEntity trending alongside #ClintonIsHastur. One eyewitness, who saw the President complete the summoning, said: ‘I saw a scaly, rubbery-looking body, with prodigious claws and an octopus-like head whose face was a mass of feelers…and next to him was Cthulhu!’.
Cthulhu was hoping to begin a reign of murder and insanity for all Earth-dwellers but was frustrated to discover Mr. Trump had got there first. Remarked one worshipper of the tentacled deity: ‘The irony is Cthulhu has been trying for years to summon Trump’.
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