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We can't bear bare bears

With a partially clothed Winnie-the-Pooh being banned in Poland and Sooty showing a bit of exposed wrist; the nation has been forced to ask – Can we bar the bears that bare while bearing the bears that don’t?

Controversy surrounds the sexual nature of Paddington’s new film, with the BBFC warning that it will give A Clockwork Orange a run for its money. In one deleted scene, Paddington smears his genitals with marmalade, shouting at Mr. Gruber to: ‘Taste my mixed peel, you grumpy bastard!’. However, executives refuse to confirm or deny that ‘Darkest Peru’ had been used as a euphemism.

A critic said: ‘The moment Baloo flashed Mowgli, bears have been on a downward spiral. Rupert Bear had his legs tattooed yellow check, so he could expose himself without anyone knowing. And as for Yogi Bear and Boo Boo - one hat and two ties between them, the rest is all naked. And you really don’t want to know what Bears do in the woods!’

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