top of page

Your gran asks: ‘Do you remember when Miley Cyrus was a thing?’

In the midst of election fever and facing Brexit, it is easy to get nostalgic for an era of innocent twerking with gentlemen-callers, like Robin Thicke. Likewise, who can forget watching Dame Vera Lynn provocatively touching herself with a big foam finger?

Pensioners and war veterans spent much of this week reminiscing about a simpler time – a time of bra-less tea dances, stripper poles and communal hammer licking. Meanwhile, sentimental street parties were held in memory of Miss Cyrus - ‘the tramp next door’ - as children cavorted in crop tops, ripping up a bong.

Said one naked octogenarian, as she straddled a wrecking ball – flaps in the wind: ‘When I talk to youngsters about 2013, they can’t imagine what it was like – with no 3-D printers and only limited WiFi. But the olden days were much more refined; young ladies would often pose duck-faced on a Hello Kitty bedspread, rubbing their midriff in baby-oil. It was classy’.

Yet can we turn the clock back? Can we return to a time when tongues were a mere 8-10 inches long and hair was undercut with a lawn strimmer? Many retirees will ask themselves – are these ‘blue remembered hills’ or another topless Miley photoshoot in the cold?

If you enjoyed this archive item, why not buy thousands of archive stories found in our eBooks, paperbacks and hardbacks?

Earth to be Recycled

Five go Dobbing in the Neighbours

15 Years of Typos

14 views0 comments
bottom of page