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Celebrities ‘too scared to die’ in wake of Savile scandal

the show must go onFollowing the controversy, many famous people are avoiding death like the plague.

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Spain snaps-up disused ‘Go Home Vans’ to rid Costa Del Sol of ‘annoying English’

Nobody expected the Spanish exposition ‘They’re just really rubbish tourists; they can’t even tan properly.’

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Scare Flu spreads from tabloids to the broadsheets

probably caught it from contact with the tabloids The lethal infection may cause mass panic on a scale not seen since a Scottish swan was supposed to have died from Bird Flu.

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Liberal Democrats ‘will be more like Apprentice contestants’, promises Clegg

"a bloody shambles"‘The Liberal Democrats are going to step up to the plate, give it 150 per cent, think outside the box and deliver incredible results.’

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Millions of badger refugees flood across Welsh border

badgers Sarge, fousands of 'emSections of the M5 and the Severn Bridge were shut last night as thousands of badger refugees fled in convoy from villages in Gloucestershire and Somerset over the border to Wales.

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