Following the controversy, many famous people are avoiding death like the plague.
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‘They’re just really rubbish tourists; they can’t even tan properly.’
The lethal infection may cause mass panic on a scale not seen since a Scottish swan was supposed to have died from Bird Flu.
‘The Liberal Democrats are going to step up to the plate, give it 150 per cent, think outside the box and deliver incredible results.’
Sections of the M5 and the Severn Bridge were shut last night as thousands of badger refugees fled in convoy from villages in Gloucestershire and Somerset over the border to Wales.