SpaceX plans to launch the world’s biggest ever rocket in a laughable attempt to prove once and for all that Elon Musk’s overblown sense of self importance isn’t actually detectable from orbit.
The huge launch device known as Mikok 1 should thrust upwards into the moist Texan atmosphere, carrying a payload of highly sophisticated optical instruments, including the world’s biggest set of reverse binoculars.
A team of the company’s top space scientists and sycophants will continue to go over the meticulously planned launch, covering every facet of the rocket’s expected trajectory in minute detail. A difficult operation made all the more treacherous as mission critical staff kept getting fired via their Twitter accounts at random intervals.
The project was conceived in 2021 after two other pointless billionaires, Jeff Bezos and Richard Branson both put their lives where their money was and blasted into orbit from the safety of a well set up TV studio, which was only slightly more convincing than Channel 4’s 2005 series, Space Cadets.
It is hoped that the success of this mission will enable SpaceX to continue deeper into the cosmos, where Mr Musk is believed to be in heated discussions with God’s legal representatives about a potential hostile takeover of monotheism.
