top of page

Jacob Rees-Mogg has revealed he has no intention of throwing his Victorian pith helmet into the ring, as the number of Tory leadership candidates surges.


The MP for North East Somerset, and Right Honourable member for at least 250 years ago, said it's a lovely old hat and chucking it on the floor would wreck the thing.


"While there have been numerous members suggesting I stand, I feel now is not the right time," said Rees-Mogg, 109, from on top of his penny farthing.


"I've even had Johnny Rotten backing me, Sadly, though, I don't want to ruin my pith helmet; it often accompanies me on family holidays to Prussia, Mesopotamia and the Sudetenland."


Some people have called for stricter rules on standing as leader, saying too many people have thrown their hat into the ring. At the last count, all but one Tory MP had put their name forward.


A caretaker function for Boris is not the right description as ours has to fix things, as part of his job.


Still not all is lost. After the catering lady left her position it's understood Boris managed to find the manual for the Teasmade. He remarked, ‘I have a whiteboard for the list of names for sugar and milk, which can be rewritten at short notice. AND the missus can bake delicious scones (or scons), whatever.’


story by: syntaxerror01


photo: https://pixabay.com/users/jillwellington-334088/


Immediately after announcing his resignation as leader of the Conservative Party, Boris Johnson said he would stand in next week’s elections for the 1922 Committee executive.


'As I am, errr…that is to say…no longer leader of the party, I am, ipso facto, not a senior Tory and urgo I am duly eligible to join the 1922 Committee and stand for its executive. QED!'


Had Johnson not resigned, it was widely expected that the new executive would have changed its rules so backbenchers did not need to wait a year between launching no confidence votes in the leader.


In an unexpected twist, Johnson has now come out in favour of changing the rules and is making this a key strand of his campaign.


He said the rules should clearly state that if the party leader resigns but stays on as Prime Minister. 'Out of the goodness of my...I mean their…heart to ensure stability over the summer, then the post of Prime Minister must be inferred on them for my…I mean their…lifetime.'


He added that anybody called Gove should be barred for any leadership bid and should be given the title of "oily, little snake-like traitor".


'I completely see the need to change these rules, he said. 'It is crucial to the survival of my career…I mean democracy within the party.'


Jacob Rees-Mogg described the proposals as “eminently sensible” and offered his resignation from the Cabinet in support.


story: stanleym


bottom of page