
Her priorities in the Spending Review should see monster profits for baliffs, undertakers and bombs. As she promised billions in subsidy to private nuclear firms, which is great news for any disabled person on benefits, who also owns a nuclear reactor.
She claimed that the economy was improving for everyone, provided they still had organs to sell. She said she would cut regulations that stifle growth, particularly the ones that made it criminal to steal. She insisted there would be extra funds for the NHS, which will see a great dividend when the private sector asset strips it to pay for a weekend in Las Vegas.
Defense spending was her key economic driver, with huge profits in artificial limbs, body bags and PTSD-themed Get Well Soon cards. Responding to her critics, who said her statement was full of lies, she boasted that it was the one area of the economy that had shown 100% growth!
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