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Racist-in-chief Donald Trump has reportedly complained to aides that he hasn't yet got to one of the bits of his Presidency he was most looking forward to – incarcerating black people without trial – or without a crime.


In a late night social media post, Trump began frothing at the mouth 'It's called the WHITE House for a reason. It's about time that American police forces got tougher on black people – a few more mysterious deaths whilst in custody. No more George Floyds though – evidence is bad!'


'I have removed of the Black Lives Matter Plaza mural in Washington, because black guys love fried chicken, so there aren't enough chickens, so there aren't enough eggs, so egg prices are going up. I am the egg man. Goo-goo g'joob.'


The Elon-bot bleeped in support 'I am African, so it's not racist. Unless Immigration are asking, in which case, I'm definitely American. African Americans are simply too lazy to inherit an emerald mine in an apartheid controlled regime, like me. So they should be in jail. Or working in the mine. As long as they are forced to work and they're not paid. And maybe there's a overseer. I'm just asking questions.'


Many, including some in the Republican party have condemned Trump's remarks.


One leading Republican said 'This is disgraceful and un American – being black, I mean. I support President Trump and everything he is doing. Lock them up. Lock them up.'


Image: WixAI


Before Musk, Trump and Putin, B L O'Feld led the field in World Domination.


Barry Liam O'Feld, CEO of B L O'Feld Megalomaniac Industries (BLOMI), wants a super evil secret lair building in a remote South Seas location to destroy the planet or possibly worse, so he needs a project manager; which is fortunate as Brian wants a job. Unfortunately Brian is a catering manager, so naturally he lies. Luckily for Brian, lying is a core value for O'Feld Industries.


In Project: Evil follow the progress of Brian’s project meeting by meeting, observing the interaction of the various stakeholders from the project sponsor to the humble henchpersons employed as cannon fodder as Brian struggles to keep the project on track. Not only does he have to cope with the warped logic of a company that doesn’t value its own life let alone that of its enemies, he has to deal with the unwelcome advances of the octogenarian Secret Service agent James Bund while also somehow project managing the Christmas office party as O’Feld rushes to beat his peer megalomaniacs such as Doktor Negatif and Gold Digit to be the first to destroy the planet.


If project management has ever seemed a mystery, a black art or even (improbably) a dull activity then Project: Evil may be the only book that will make you realise just how funny the subject can be. It may even help you understand why the bad guys feel inclined to run around in sh!t coloured pyjamas when the going gets tough. Recommended reading for all project managers and sufferers of their art form everywhere.


Ray Sullivan is a writer and editor for Newsbiscuit. He has ten novels published ranging in genres from comedy, science fiction and thrillers.



Available in ebook - £1.99


and


paperback format £5.99


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