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Ryanair announces new perks


'Fresh air is a rare commodity and we're proud to be the first airline to offer this,' said a Ryanair spokesman, 'and at only £7 it's a steal,' he added.


'We accept there are less dramatic ways of achieving this and are actively retrofitting hinges and release mechanisms under the control of cabin staff. This does not include sticking your head out to get a better view, obviously. That's £5 extra', he said.


image from Google Gemini


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Government to Trial "Smart Flight Paths"

The UK's flight paths - many of which were decided 70 years ago - will be re-designed for modern aircraft and flying habits through the introduction of technologies successfully proven on the UK's Smart Motorway Network, the government has revealed.


Speaking at Heathrow Airport this morning, the Aviation Minister showed how a revamp would improve travel in busy areas such as around London, telling us, "Using drones, we'll create airborne gantries that control the approach speed and volume of aircraft in an area. During busy times, this means we can increase the number of landing slots with no detriment or risk to anyone. Just look at the M1 or M25 in rush-hour and you can see how well and safely this idea works."


The Civil Aviation Authority has agreed to the idea, providing they are given funding for a fleet of aeroplanes to put out airborne cones in the event of a breakdown, or simply because they feel like it.


image from pixabay


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