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Consumers blast ‘ready to eat’ pears scam


Trading Standards officers have been inundated with complaints about ‘ready to eat’ pears.  Customers say that, despite paying twice the price of ordinary pears, ready-to-eat pears are often anything but.


‘It’s obviously a scam,’ says pear-loving Colin Froot from Dorset.  ‘You buy regular pears in bulk, repackage them as ‘ready-to-eat’ and double the price.  Instant profit.  It’s the same dodgy crew that buy ordinary eggs and repackage them as free-range.


‘I’m fed up with buying ‘ready-to-eat’ pears that are so hard that you could rob a jewellers shop with them.  And when I buy a tray of ‘ready-to-eat’ pears and a bag of ripen at home pears, then guess what?  They are all bullet hard when I get them home, and they all suddenly and randomly go soft on the same day in about two weeks time.  And the day after that, they’re all just a sticky puddle in the fruit bowl.


‘Fresh fruit is a big scam.  In future, I’m only going to eat UPFs.  They’re not good for you, but at least you know what you’re getting.


Photo by khloe arledge on Unsplash

Valentine’s Day relationship test subverted by big business



According to social media, you can find out if your partner really loves you by suggesting that they should peel an orange for you. If they are prepared to undertake this small act of kindness for you, then they are indeed a keeper.


However, big business has moved in to undermine the test, as up-market stores are now selling pre-peeling oranges, satsumas, kumquats and even grapes. And to minimise the effort required even further, you can have them delivered to your house in under 30 minutes.


So, if you feel the need to test your partner in this way, you should make sure that they haven’t been cheating on you with the internet.


Experts say that it may be better to address the issue more directly. For example, by asking your partner if they can lend you fifty quid.


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