A smartly dressed man ordered a martini for Rachel Reeves, asking it to be not stirred, but very shaken.
‘The name’s Bonds. Government Bonds.
‘Your polishies are a dishaster. You’ve borrowed too much. You’re shpending too much. I’m Government Bonds, and I’ve come out of retirement to warn you to turn back. My interest levels in your activities are very high – the highest they’ve been since 1998. They’re heading towards 007 per cent.
‘Don’t try and laugh that off. That period since 1998 includes the Liz Truss and Kwasi Kwarteng debacle, Brexit, and the whole Boris Johnson evil supervillain thing.
People are shkared. They are saving all their money, and they're worried about a tax bombshell. Government spending is up, living costs are up, taxes are up, the games up. Turn back now, or everything will blow up.
And why are you stroking a fluffy white cat?
Image credit: perchance.org
