- Jeremynh
- 5 hours ago
It's one of the greatest tests of endurance known to humankind and will leave even the keenest followers of the news wondering why the hell they bother.
Yes! It's the Mandelson Marathon - a low-voltage scandal involving some dusty old political has-been from the Blair years and a handful of crashingly dull senior civil servants which is, unfortunately, set to run and run around the Westminster village.
'After a week of hearing Starmer making hours-long statements about who said what at precisely what time in the afternoon, and talking about the fine print of security vetting rules, you will all be finding life achingly dull," said one Fleet Street newspaper editor who is organising the event.
'After a month, you will be screaming for a rest, as in: 'For pity's sake, just give it a rest!
"The winner of the Mandelson Marathon will be the one newspaper reader in Britain who is still remotely interested in any of this by the time the story finally collapses of exhaustion... in about three year's time.
"Good luck, everyone!'
